i love it when my girl pisses on my hand whilst fisting her
this shit is funny
I'm in love with a girl. She's married, but I knew her four years before she met him. Now I want to make her hate him so I won't hurt her feelings when I kill him.
— it should have been me
Hey AH,

You are a cock bag. You took far more than you gave. I am so over you.

Goodbye, slit face. Go spew your vitriolic hate and loathsome self centered attitude elsewhere.

By the way, you were a lousy lay, too. My dick is bigger...and as I chick, I don't even have one!!!!!

Eat death shit please...and a lot of it
— KAL
How did I sink to writing on a pixelated bathroom wall? If I wrote on a real bathroom wall, there was always the slim, fleeting chance that a disheveled transvestite or a burly homosexual would call me... but... only lonely wankers look at this. Crap.
Fuck You
— KC
Here I sit feeling sick, Just gave birth to another Nick




just
I like it when the red water comes out.
— Salad Fingers
How do I wrote wall?
I've spent hundreds of dollars on phone sex. It's either that or spend hundreds of dollars on a date that I can't hang up on, and at least I can be honest about what I want with phone-sex operators. So to you, phone-sex operators of the world, BRAVO! You're doing the world a much bigger service than you realize!
I get sexual pleasure from holding in my urine. It feels close to orgasm every time the urge to pee comes back, and I like to imagine myself getting fucked from behind.
I love having sex with fat chicks.
I haven't been laid in almost a year and a half. It fucking sucks.
AZ only please
— appliance
Looking for girlfriends.
Srs.
Oh well, we all die anyway so instead of feeling sorry for yourself git off yow ass and do somethingworthwhile, quit the friggin moaning, that's too easy, let go and learn, and maybe nexttime, just maybe....
— Dom(the cheery girl)
It dont matter, in the end we are all the same, a bag of bones, so quit being pussies and take a walk or something...move dem bones cause one day they are just gonna be laying there.
— Cada
Notice I put myself into that category as well... you better think of another way to extend your existence... I know! Souls, ghosts, spirits, heaven, hell... good ploy... now go fucking die, loser.
I am a loser. You are a loser. You will never amount to anything. You are the scourge of this pathetic earthly existence. Ha ha.
If I leave right now... take my $$ that I have and run away... fuck all.
I hope that in the future... you all realize you will die... you will be meaningless, and everything that you buillt up in your life was pointless shit. We all die... we rot away... and we will never be again.
— FU
If you knew what I knew... you would at least consider suicide.
I want to fuck Brynn on the baseball team. She's 26 and has nice frame, nice face and nice big tits. I bet she gives great head too. Oh ya, were both married too. Hmmmmmmmmm.
— A.Nus
Dontcha just love scratchin' your starfish sometimes. Just give it a good scratch and then ya gotta smell yer finger. Excellent!
— A.Nus
Anyone got some good pot to smoke if so send me a price and a pickup point. OH yeah i need a blowjob send me a mail
— Cody
i still love u rosario!!!! i think about u everyday. when u and doris broke up, u said ur story and mine had just begun. so why did it end?
i want a blowjob and i live in altoona 327-9498
— randy
jng
a
'How Could I Ever Stop Loving You?'

You Proved You Could And Broke My Heart
We're together for 5 years, he has an affair with my friend, and I don't find out until SHE'S upset because he cheated on HER with someone else!!! I left my husband for this jerk!!!
— N.
It happened by accident. We were at a party, just hanging out. I had had WAY to much sugar (never one for the booze) and was feeling sorta weird. So I turned to Kia and was like, "Hey, what's it like to have sex with a girl?" and she smiled. She said, "Iet's find out!". So she led me to her dorm.
She eased me onto the bed, and slid on top of me. Her moist lips reached mine. Her slippery tongue opened my mouth, and then she started kissing like hell. We were kissing for about a 1/2 hour, when I realized her hand was resting on my boob. She began to wiggle her hand around, and down, slowly easing under my shirt. Her hands were warm, slipping below my bra, unhooking the clasp. My hands were moving from her neck to rest on her sumptious breasts. Her shirt was off in an instant, and before I knew it, mine was off too. I moved her away for a moment, to admire her full boobs and little nipples. I touched one, experimentally. It felt good, so I moved my hands around them. I couldn't stop. Her hands were all over me too, and she worked her way into my jeans.
I didn't need to be asked twice. I shoved my hands into her underwear and pulled it off. We were naked and on top of each other, rolling around, when I stopped. "Wait, how does this work?" I asked. She had no penis and no dildo.
Smiling, she brought out her hand again. I braced myself for the pain, but all I felt was pure bliss. My orgasm peaked, and oh, oh oh! She drew her finger out and instead, stuck her tongue in. It slid into my hole with a squelch of pleasure. I screamed in adoration and sensuality.
— hotchick101
One of my best friends is a girl I've known for 4 years...but how do I get the point across that I want to fuck her? I mean, being friends is great...but it could be better.
— Tyrone
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